Grief affects everyone at some point. Most of us will experience it, whether through the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, the end of a relationship or another change that turns life upside down.

Everyone Grieves Differently

Grief is very personal and does not follow a neat pattern or timetable. You may cry, feel angry, withdraw or feel empty, and none of this is unusual or wrong. Everyone mourns differently, but there are some feelings that many people share.

The Five Stages of Grief

One well-known way of describing grief is the five stages model, first set out by the psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross. The stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. Not everyone experiences all five, and they do not always happen in order; many people move back and forth between them.

Denial

Grief is a powerful emotion, and it is not unusual to respond at first with disbelief or numbness. Denial can give you time to absorb the news gradually and begin to process it. It is a natural way of protecting yourself from overwhelming feelings. Finding a funeral director who understands can help. For Funeral Directors Essex, visit a site like T Cribb, leading Funeral Directors Essex.

Anger

Anger can mask a lot of the pain you are carrying. It may be directed at others, at the person who died, at yourself or even at objects. Your rational mind may know they are not to blame, but in the moment your emotions can be too strong.

Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance

Bargaining often involves thoughts of “if only” or “what if”. A period of deep sadness or depression is a natural part of grieving. Over time, many people reach a kind of acceptance, where the loss is still painful but they are able to carry on with life.

Getting Support

If you are struggling with grief, talk to friends and family, your GP or a bereavement charity such as Cruse Bereavement Support.

Related: Why we need to talk more about death